One Last Time… (3rd blog in a series of blogs from FitChic)

For many months now I have been paying very close attention to how different foods affect me, how they make me feel and function. Do they help or hinder me in any way? Do the benefits outweigh the risks? As I progress along in my studies, old time favorites, several in fact, just aren’t doing it for me anymore. I guess in the end that’s a benefit within itself.

Since about March or April of this year, I have been paying particular attention to Fast Food. Although I’m not what you call a Fast Food Junkie, I still like it every now and then. But lately, that’s been changing. The more in-tuned I become with my body, the more I notice ill side effects from eating it. The more side effects that I recognize, the less the taste satisfies me. Thus, leading me to naturally shy away from it regardless of what others have said about it for years. Despite knowing full well what this meal would to me physically and mentally, I ordered McDonald’s for lunch this afternoon.

My very wonderful husband decided to share his germs with me and now I’m brutally sick. One of those head and chest colds where it leaves you a few cards short of a full deck. When Mom always said “sharing is polite”, I doubt she meant this! So I’m taking a rest/recovery week. I figure it’s for the best anyhow since I’m starting ChaLEAN Extreme and Turbo Fire next week. I will definitely need all the rest I can get to be prepared for that! I’ve also been pondering my food selections and making a list of foods to have on hand for when next week rolls around. In the past, I would have called this my “DIET” (Deprivation-is Intentional Emotional Torture). Now, I’m calling it my “Diet”- The technical term of one’s food intake. Big difference huh? So I figured I’d have some McDonald’s. I didn’t feel like cooking and I NEEDED to get the crave out of my system anyhow. Well I did. I don’t want to deprive myself and I won’t, but I also don’t want to feel like THIS (after-effects of McDonald’s) anymore either.

Much like Chips Ahoy Cookies, most ice cream, pre-packaged entrées including the Lean Option Varieties, pre-packaged baked goods/desserts, eating anything with too much white sugar (wow- that one was a hard one to accept; although Raw Sugar is good with my system), most salad dressings, and meals out regardless of restaurant, Fast Food is on the growing list of foods that don’t: A. Appeal to me much anymore B. Don’t taste nearly as good as they used to back in the day C. Make me feel like crap D. Cause mood swings…note: line “C” E. Leave an odd taste or oil-like slick in my mouth.

**Sigh**

While it’s sad to the nostalgic side of me, who doesn’t remember the childhood memories all of those things brought you? I certainly do with every single last one. I also find it to be a relief. I’ve been so afraid of starting a new fitness routine and eating better after these surgeries for fear of falling into my old traps. I used to DIET all of the time and I’d be ok for a while then wham, a Binge. Binging and Dieting are the last two things in this world that I ever want to do again. I’ve been so focused on not doing either one of them, that I forgot to step outside the box and challenge myself once in while. I mean, if you’re not challenged, how do you progress to the next level?

Update: I think my intestines are going to rip out of my body. YUMM-O! I digress.

So that’s what I am doing both with fitness and now all levels of eating; physically and emotionally. I have to challenge my body or it will not get stronger and I will not be able to enjoy those things that I once did. I’ll be in pain and sluggish from here on out. Not happening! I have to challenge myself mentally because if I don’t get out of this comfort zone with ignoring my emotional-food past, I can’t truly heal and move to the next stage. McDonald’s today actually helped me with that. I understand how eating foods that don’t make me feel good on all levels aren’t the best choice for me. That’s just because they may comfort an emotional need, it still doesn’t outweigh the negative that they inflict on me physically. I understand that as time goes by I don’t really like the taste of those things anymore. I also understand that if I give myself time and the wiggle room needed, I may fall but I’ll get back up stronger in spite of it.

I had to try fast food one last time just to make sure this is how I felt. That it would without fail, leave me with unpleasant side effects. I know that every now and then after so many months, I’ll have to try it again for a reminder. But that compared to days or weeks worth of binging because I felt “deprived” is so much better! I am looking forward to eating better after this and I know I’ll be eating healthfully especially once CLX begins. I hate feeling like this now and I’m sick; I especially hate it after intense workouts. It’s good to know that for once, I truly want and like to eat better, not just because it’s something I have to do. It does a body, mind, and soul…good!

Til next time, FitChic Comments can be sent to FitChic at FitChic_2010@yahoo.com

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